The danger with writing alot is; you risk diluting the message.
The same can be said for the way time dulls the intensity of reactions to shocking news.
You never get a second chance to make a first impression.
Do you think that's true?
If I asked you again, would you think the same thing you just thought?
As Kathy adjusts to life in the REALLY slow lane, she has time to change the first impression that people get, to move ahead of where she was.
This is encouraging to those of us who have been with her since the accident.
It's a little misleading though, to anyone who missed where she came from.
It's easy to look at Kathy and see that, other than a cast on her right foot/leg and a left leg that won't quite work right, she is as beautiful as she always was!
What's the big deal, right? She's going to be fiiiine.
I hope you're right.
I tell Kathy that she needs to be patient, that she will recover, that I'm not full of s***, naively spouting optimistic encouragements.
It's like watching a puppy grow; If you see that puppy every day, it doesn't seem like it's changing much, but if you didn't see it for a week or two...
Kathy doesn't see her improvement the way you will when you see her.
You will leave with the impression that Ted is one lucky man,
and you will be right!
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Sunday, November 27, 2011
a different point of view
Ted here. Just read my last posting.
I had a much bigger idea in mind when I started writing it, then rushed it short and posted without checking how it flowed.
Basically, I was trying to write something cool about miracles and Kathy.
It sounds like a bit of an exaggeration to use "miracle", when much bigger "miracles", more deserving of the name, have occurred in history past.
I was then admitting how if nothing else improved in Kathy's condition, it's alright by me.
I'm just happy to have her back home!
Still, for Kathy, it sure will be nice if she can get back enough to do what she's always done.
LIVE LIFE BIG!!!
Sometimes, what seems to be a little thing for one person - can be HUGE for someone else
(Not sure walking is a little thing for anyone though)!
Alright, let me catch you up -
In the last few days both Michelle's have visited, along with Ian, Theresa, Daniel, Uncle Mike & Aunt Traci, My sister and her family, Jessica, Jerome, Kristie, Julie (my daughter-in-law) and Gage was in town too. Kathy has really enjoyed the company!
Kathy is getting more "able" everyday!
Usually pays for it later, but she is doing things better and faster!
She wheels herself around (slowly on carpet) to see all the things she USED to do, that are not done so well now.
It creates a crazy frustration level for Kathy to have to let go of some of the little things (see above).
The girls are a big help in this area.
Example; I couldn't seem to get the counter wiped good enough.
Then I looked at it from wheelchair level. Oops! She's right! I DID miss spots!
The "mottled mix" appearance of the counter hides crumbs from a top view.
This is going to take some getting used to for all of us.
I think a different perspective is going to be the norm for awhile.
I had a much bigger idea in mind when I started writing it, then rushed it short and posted without checking how it flowed.
Basically, I was trying to write something cool about miracles and Kathy.
It sounds like a bit of an exaggeration to use "miracle", when much bigger "miracles", more deserving of the name, have occurred in history past.
I was then admitting how if nothing else improved in Kathy's condition, it's alright by me.
I'm just happy to have her back home!
Still, for Kathy, it sure will be nice if she can get back enough to do what she's always done.
LIVE LIFE BIG!!!
Sometimes, what seems to be a little thing for one person - can be HUGE for someone else
(Not sure walking is a little thing for anyone though)!
Alright, let me catch you up -
In the last few days both Michelle's have visited, along with Ian, Theresa, Daniel, Uncle Mike & Aunt Traci, My sister and her family, Jessica, Jerome, Kristie, Julie (my daughter-in-law) and Gage was in town too. Kathy has really enjoyed the company!
Kathy is getting more "able" everyday!
Usually pays for it later, but she is doing things better and faster!
She wheels herself around (slowly on carpet) to see all the things she USED to do, that are not done so well now.
It creates a crazy frustration level for Kathy to have to let go of some of the little things (see above).
The girls are a big help in this area.
Example; I couldn't seem to get the counter wiped good enough.
Then I looked at it from wheelchair level. Oops! She's right! I DID miss spots!
The "mottled mix" appearance of the counter hides crumbs from a top view.
This is going to take some getting used to for all of us.
I think a different perspective is going to be the norm for awhile.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
In the realm of miracles
Cool heading, huh?
I'm practicing epic descriptions in this post - to better prepare myself for the day Kathy dances again.
I don't want to be caught offguard, without an idea of how to express the full impact of the moment.
Empires rise and fall, but knowledge of their history is dependent on the stories the bards tell.
What do you think of the Romans? The Greeks? The British? How about the Mayans?
I think these Dynasties fell because their foundation crumbled.
It's not as simple as just that, but in a weird way, it is.
Look at how they lost the focus to stay true to what made them great! (Is this still a Kathy blog?)
Maybe I don't know what I'm talking about (in truth, I wasn't there then), but in Kathy's case, I do not care what comes after the fall.
I care only that the fall does not happen at all!
Her legs are NOT her foundation.
Kathy's foundation is built on fearless compassion and adventure, on a trust that she won't get hurt (by people or life).
When Kathy's trust IS disappointed and she's hurt, it doesn't make her jaded to life (or those left in hers). THAT is the part that can't die.
Because her foundation does not crumble, her legs can be destroyed, but the strength of who she is still holds up.
She deserves to walk again.
Not for me, I don't need it for her to be My Forever, but for Kathy, I pray she dances again.
It is not an impossible request.
Sooner or later, everyone prays,.. for themselves, for someone else, for deliverance, for a cure... for a miracle.
I'm practicing epic descriptions in this post - to better prepare myself for the day Kathy dances again.
I don't want to be caught offguard, without an idea of how to express the full impact of the moment.
Empires rise and fall, but knowledge of their history is dependent on the stories the bards tell.
What do you think of the Romans? The Greeks? The British? How about the Mayans?
I think these Dynasties fell because their foundation crumbled.
It's not as simple as just that, but in a weird way, it is.
Look at how they lost the focus to stay true to what made them great! (Is this still a Kathy blog?)
Maybe I don't know what I'm talking about (in truth, I wasn't there then), but in Kathy's case, I do not care what comes after the fall.
I care only that the fall does not happen at all!
Her legs are NOT her foundation.
Kathy's foundation is built on fearless compassion and adventure, on a trust that she won't get hurt (by people or life).
When Kathy's trust IS disappointed and she's hurt, it doesn't make her jaded to life (or those left in hers). THAT is the part that can't die.
Because her foundation does not crumble, her legs can be destroyed, but the strength of who she is still holds up.
She deserves to walk again.
Not for me, I don't need it for her to be My Forever, but for Kathy, I pray she dances again.
It is not an impossible request.
Sooner or later, everyone prays,.. for themselves, for someone else, for deliverance, for a cure... for a miracle.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Ted here.
Thanksgiving wasn't so strange after all!
As they so often do, plans changed.
Oh, I could've done the lazy male thing when plans at my Aunt Tracy's wouldn't work, then the get together at our house fell through, and I could've ordered Chinese. Kathy always has someone to back me up in cases like this though, as Shasta City Michelle brought over plates of turkey food and fixings!
Not to worry, I, Ted, had things under control.
That's right, I cooked a Thanksgiving dinner!
We didn't have turkey, but ham is a good substitute if you aren't going to have turkey, right? Ham, with a bit of mashed potatoes, corn, salad, cottage cheese with peaches, cranberry sauce and a fruit salad! Yum! Except Kathy only nibbles these days (maybe it was the bone marrow soup she ate just before dinner). Still, it had a Thanksgivingy feel to it, so I'm putting a star sticker by my name!
My sister and her family came late and are staying the night.
Thanks to all who called Kathy today. Hope your day went well!
Thanksgiving wasn't so strange after all!
As they so often do, plans changed.
Oh, I could've done the lazy male thing when plans at my Aunt Tracy's wouldn't work, then the get together at our house fell through, and I could've ordered Chinese. Kathy always has someone to back me up in cases like this though, as Shasta City Michelle brought over plates of turkey food and fixings!
Not to worry, I, Ted, had things under control.
That's right, I cooked a Thanksgiving dinner!
We didn't have turkey, but ham is a good substitute if you aren't going to have turkey, right? Ham, with a bit of mashed potatoes, corn, salad, cottage cheese with peaches, cranberry sauce and a fruit salad! Yum! Except Kathy only nibbles these days (maybe it was the bone marrow soup she ate just before dinner). Still, it had a Thanksgivingy feel to it, so I'm putting a star sticker by my name!
My sister and her family came late and are staying the night.
Thanks to all who called Kathy today. Hope your day went well!
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
look me in the eye
Only the best.
When they lose, only the best know how to win again.
There are only so many ways to respond to pain.
The physical kind; you beat it, you bear it or you give up.
(Heartbreak, not so easy. There is no cure for that, but time.)
Some people have been hurt enough in life already. Sometimes, there is no predicting when bad things will happen.
That's why I tell My Boys that whoever told you life was fair, lied to you!
It makes you wonder how some people keep starting over.
How they find that happy place again. That's a skill that deserves admiration.
The kind of person who knows that things will never be the same, who loved how things were, yet still moves on to the next thing without losing who they are. The disappointment of the loss is still there, but they don't stay beaten.
I like the story that tells of someone getting on the wrong plane heading for Holland, when they thought they were heading for Paris. They could be stuck wishing for what they don't have, or they can check out the new place they are in and see that Holland can be amazing too!
Sometimes we get on the wrong plane without realizing it. It doesn't mean where we end up, isn't going to be a wonderful place!
When they lose, only the best know how to win again.
There are only so many ways to respond to pain.
The physical kind; you beat it, you bear it or you give up.
(Heartbreak, not so easy. There is no cure for that, but time.)
Some people have been hurt enough in life already. Sometimes, there is no predicting when bad things will happen.
That's why I tell My Boys that whoever told you life was fair, lied to you!
It makes you wonder how some people keep starting over.
How they find that happy place again. That's a skill that deserves admiration.
The kind of person who knows that things will never be the same, who loved how things were, yet still moves on to the next thing without losing who they are. The disappointment of the loss is still there, but they don't stay beaten.
I like the story that tells of someone getting on the wrong plane heading for Holland, when they thought they were heading for Paris. They could be stuck wishing for what they don't have, or they can check out the new place they are in and see that Holland can be amazing too!
Sometimes we get on the wrong plane without realizing it. It doesn't mean where we end up, isn't going to be a wonderful place!
Monday, November 21, 2011
Not de Boss No Mo'
This whole "Kathy Meets the Wall" thing has brought the family closer together.
My Boys have been great with her!
Kathy has to rely on people for so many ordinary things we all take for granted, that she has to give up control.
THAT'S RIGHT, THE INMATES ARE RUNNING THE ASYLUM!!!
Can't check if the chores are being done if you can't get around to it!
Is the upstairs bathroom clean? Teenage boy clean, or Kathy clean? Just have to trust that My Boys listened & learned from before. (when Kathy was able to inspect).
Are the plants watered? The right way? Then why are the leaves drooping? Will someone check it again to make sure it wasn't missed? (Ooh, it must make her SO mad that she has to ask nicely!).
Ted, could you put the laundry from the washer to the dryer? Please listen for the buzzer so the clothes can be folded before the wrinkles set. (See what I mean?).
This is like that moment when everyone realizes that cars can't run over you because it's against the law & you can SUE them if they do! We can run in the streets! Unimpeded Daring Delight!
That's right, WE'RE IN CHARGE NOW!
This is a house run by males! Pizza every night! Crumbs on the counter! We don't have to wash our hands anymore! Or FLUSH!
Kathy can barely maneuver herself into her wheel chair! If I don't oil the wheels, she can't even sneak up on us!
If we turn the TV up in the other room, we won't have to be bothered if she hollers!
Except,.. My Boys wouldn't go for it...
This mutiny was over before it even started.
(Temporary immobilization for Kathy does not equal temporary insanity for My Boys).
Don't let the headline fool you, Kathy is still Queen.
Just the way we like it.
My Boys have been great with her!
Kathy has to rely on people for so many ordinary things we all take for granted, that she has to give up control.
THAT'S RIGHT, THE INMATES ARE RUNNING THE ASYLUM!!!
Can't check if the chores are being done if you can't get around to it!
Is the upstairs bathroom clean? Teenage boy clean, or Kathy clean? Just have to trust that My Boys listened & learned from before. (when Kathy was able to inspect).
Are the plants watered? The right way? Then why are the leaves drooping? Will someone check it again to make sure it wasn't missed? (Ooh, it must make her SO mad that she has to ask nicely!).
Ted, could you put the laundry from the washer to the dryer? Please listen for the buzzer so the clothes can be folded before the wrinkles set. (See what I mean?).
This is like that moment when everyone realizes that cars can't run over you because it's against the law & you can SUE them if they do! We can run in the streets! Unimpeded Daring Delight!
That's right, WE'RE IN CHARGE NOW!
This is a house run by males! Pizza every night! Crumbs on the counter! We don't have to wash our hands anymore! Or FLUSH!
Kathy can barely maneuver herself into her wheel chair! If I don't oil the wheels, she can't even sneak up on us!
If we turn the TV up in the other room, we won't have to be bothered if she hollers!
Except,.. My Boys wouldn't go for it...
This mutiny was over before it even started.
(Temporary immobilization for Kathy does not equal temporary insanity for My Boys).
Don't let the headline fool you, Kathy is still Queen.
Just the way we like it.
Thanks for listening
Monday mornings.
Traditionally bad.
The padding in Kathy's open cast has shifted and worn.
A couple times now, she has woke to excruciating pain from pressure points while she slept. It was the outside of the foot where the pinky toe joins it, now it is the back of the heel. Some redesigning is in order. Time to upgrade the padding!
I'm thinking Memory Foam (U.S. Patent #948,744,213, All rights reserved, To be used only with the exclusive permission of Memory Foam, Inc.).
Let's see what have we done so far? -
Woke up, helped Kathy to the toity, brought her into the kitchen in her wheel chair, made coffee and "Eggs-in-a-Hole" for us both (yes, I washed my hands first), gave Kathy her medicine, made a lunch for me, scheduled two more service calls, put her foot back into the "Boot" that she hates so much (because it forces her foot into the 90 degree position), another trip to the toity (the coffee is so good for that), situated Kathy back into bed in her sanctuary, made sure she has fresh water, remote controls, laptop, meds, phone, checked the mail, rubbed Kathy's head until she falls back to sleep (Okay, I didn't really do the rubbing her head thing, but I wish I had time to, does that count?). I have to get to work!
You see why I'm glad so many of you like her too? It's very time consuming to see to the needs of someone who can't put weight on either leg!
Jessica is incredible in so many ways through this with Kathy. I can't describe the sacrifice to her own life that she has given. Not to lessen everyone else's help (Kathy loves the Mount Shasta water and spray that Michelle brought, Cindy checks in regularly, Kristi also, many more throughout the day when I'm at work, Scuba Rick brought flowers and smiles, Mona, Thane, Parrish, and on and on). I do have to throw special props to Jess though, she has really gone above and beyond since the day this happened!
Michael would be a Shaman in another life. Nutritionist, Acupuncturist, Electrical Impulsinist, Body Art Puncturist, Free-Form-Emoting-Forward-Shadowground-Healing-Physiologist (can you tell I have no clue, what to call what he does? It does seem to work though!) Yep, Shaman Michael, you are a strange, but valuable addition to the Tribe.
Mikayla is coming over for a "Twilight" Marathon today. Kathy has never watched any of them and Mikayla is a big fan!
Looks like monday might not be so bad after all!
Traditionally bad.
The padding in Kathy's open cast has shifted and worn.
A couple times now, she has woke to excruciating pain from pressure points while she slept. It was the outside of the foot where the pinky toe joins it, now it is the back of the heel. Some redesigning is in order. Time to upgrade the padding!
I'm thinking Memory Foam (U.S. Patent #948,744,213, All rights reserved, To be used only with the exclusive permission of Memory Foam, Inc.).
Let's see what have we done so far? -
Woke up, helped Kathy to the toity, brought her into the kitchen in her wheel chair, made coffee and "Eggs-in-a-Hole" for us both (yes, I washed my hands first), gave Kathy her medicine, made a lunch for me, scheduled two more service calls, put her foot back into the "Boot" that she hates so much (because it forces her foot into the 90 degree position), another trip to the toity (the coffee is so good for that), situated Kathy back into bed in her sanctuary, made sure she has fresh water, remote controls, laptop, meds, phone, checked the mail, rubbed Kathy's head until she falls back to sleep (Okay, I didn't really do the rubbing her head thing, but I wish I had time to, does that count?). I have to get to work!
You see why I'm glad so many of you like her too? It's very time consuming to see to the needs of someone who can't put weight on either leg!
Jessica is incredible in so many ways through this with Kathy. I can't describe the sacrifice to her own life that she has given. Not to lessen everyone else's help (Kathy loves the Mount Shasta water and spray that Michelle brought, Cindy checks in regularly, Kristi also, many more throughout the day when I'm at work, Scuba Rick brought flowers and smiles, Mona, Thane, Parrish, and on and on). I do have to throw special props to Jess though, she has really gone above and beyond since the day this happened!
Michael would be a Shaman in another life. Nutritionist, Acupuncturist, Electrical Impulsinist, Body Art Puncturist, Free-Form-Emoting-Forward-Shadowground-Healing-Physiologist (can you tell I have no clue, what to call what he does? It does seem to work though!) Yep, Shaman Michael, you are a strange, but valuable addition to the Tribe.
Mikayla is coming over for a "Twilight" Marathon today. Kathy has never watched any of them and Mikayla is a big fan!
Looks like monday might not be so bad after all!
Sunday, November 20, 2011
put a fork in it
Another busy day down for Kathy.
Great visits from my aunt Tracy & uncle Mike, Jerome, Tim & Cindy, Jessica & Jaden!
Take today off the agenda.
Waking this morning, like every morning since the accident, I hoped to be here tonight.
In the first few days after Kathy's crash, I just hoped she would make it to the next day.
Then it became wanting Kathy to make it through the pain of mending herself each day, to a place where the pain fades.
At present, the pain comes in waves in the evening, but is bearable most of the day (easy for me to say, huh?).
I used to wish for slow days before she wrecked. There was never enough Kathy and I would turn in for the night wanting more time.
Now I check off the days, knowing that each day is one day closer to Kathy's next step...literally.
Great visits from my aunt Tracy & uncle Mike, Jerome, Tim & Cindy, Jessica & Jaden!
Take today off the agenda.
Waking this morning, like every morning since the accident, I hoped to be here tonight.
In the first few days after Kathy's crash, I just hoped she would make it to the next day.
Then it became wanting Kathy to make it through the pain of mending herself each day, to a place where the pain fades.
At present, the pain comes in waves in the evening, but is bearable most of the day (easy for me to say, huh?).
I used to wish for slow days before she wrecked. There was never enough Kathy and I would turn in for the night wanting more time.
Now I check off the days, knowing that each day is one day closer to Kathy's next step...literally.
Saturday, November 19, 2011
When Kathy's asleep
It's late.
Normally I would cuddle close and whisper in her ear, hoping she is still awake.
What I'm about to tell her is almost always a mystery to me until I say it.
Sometimes I just repeat tried and true like "I love you", or "Have good dreams, put me in them"
sometimes I say the first thing that I think of (which can surprise me by being a gem, or flop and bring an embarrassing unintended laugh),
sometimes I start to whisper... then stop, not wanting to wake her.
It's all an excuse to get close to her.
Since the accident it's no different.
No different, other than the frequency that I decide to not wake her.
These days, sleep is so precious.
Sometimes, when I think she's awake and I whisper in her ear, I know she doesn't hear what I said, but she reaches over or slides up next to me, and I smile.
She may have missed hearing a gem, but I didn't miss getting closer.
Right now she's sleeping.
I don't have the heart to wake her.
If I did, I would whisper something simple like, "My Beautiful Angel"
or the first thing I think of right now like, "I can barely hear you breathing, will you snore or something?"
Normally I would cuddle close and whisper in her ear, hoping she is still awake.
What I'm about to tell her is almost always a mystery to me until I say it.
Sometimes I just repeat tried and true like "I love you", or "Have good dreams, put me in them"
sometimes I say the first thing that I think of (which can surprise me by being a gem, or flop and bring an embarrassing unintended laugh),
sometimes I start to whisper... then stop, not wanting to wake her.
It's all an excuse to get close to her.
Since the accident it's no different.
No different, other than the frequency that I decide to not wake her.
These days, sleep is so precious.
Sometimes, when I think she's awake and I whisper in her ear, I know she doesn't hear what I said, but she reaches over or slides up next to me, and I smile.
She may have missed hearing a gem, but I didn't miss getting closer.
Right now she's sleeping.
I don't have the heart to wake her.
If I did, I would whisper something simple like, "My Beautiful Angel"
or the first thing I think of right now like, "I can barely hear you breathing, will you snore or something?"
Friday, November 18, 2011
fight or flight
Thanks to Jerome for hanging out all day with Kathy!
Kathy & I aren't watching my favorite TV shows until she is better.
"Walking Dead", "Game of Thrones", "Dexter" and such.
I'm sure they're your favorites too, right?
Well, we're not watching them because Michael said Kathy needs to stay away from scary or disturbing stuff. He has my confidence in his credibility so far, as his "Grounding" techniques and Eastern medicine seem to help. (Do I say this like I know what I'm talking about?) I need to call Michael and ask him what the things in Kathy's ears are.
I figure anything is okay if it makes this time of healing better!
Very much appreciation to all who give up their time and skills to help!
It makes sense that negative energy should be avoided, I guess...
People who stear clear of uncomfortable situations are afraid of being brought down, I suppose...
Except, when the energy is good and positive you WANT it, so I would not question the wisdom of avoiding stink vibes. It could be bad for someone who is wounded & weak.
The rest of us though, should be strong enough to tackle a bad scene once in a while, right?
Though she was remarkably capable in tough times, Kathy will get even stronger from this and be someone we can turn to in our own time of pain.
If you are paying attention, you too can learn what I am from this...
Kathy will be a Beautiful Inspiration.
Kathy & I aren't watching my favorite TV shows until she is better.
"Walking Dead", "Game of Thrones", "Dexter" and such.
I'm sure they're your favorites too, right?
Well, we're not watching them because Michael said Kathy needs to stay away from scary or disturbing stuff. He has my confidence in his credibility so far, as his "Grounding" techniques and Eastern medicine seem to help. (Do I say this like I know what I'm talking about?) I need to call Michael and ask him what the things in Kathy's ears are.
I figure anything is okay if it makes this time of healing better!
Very much appreciation to all who give up their time and skills to help!
It makes sense that negative energy should be avoided, I guess...
People who stear clear of uncomfortable situations are afraid of being brought down, I suppose...
Except, when the energy is good and positive you WANT it, so I would not question the wisdom of avoiding stink vibes. It could be bad for someone who is wounded & weak.
The rest of us though, should be strong enough to tackle a bad scene once in a while, right?
Though she was remarkably capable in tough times, Kathy will get even stronger from this and be someone we can turn to in our own time of pain.
If you are paying attention, you too can learn what I am from this...
Kathy will be a Beautiful Inspiration.
a mirage of a foot
There was a time when Kathy's left leg hogged all my anger because of the way it blocked any chance of comfort for her.
Now the left leg is still in the spotlight, more for what it WON'T do than what it does. Don't get me wrong, it hasn't let up on being a comfort block, the leg still produces alot of that "P" word that I told myself not to write in this post (in case the left leg is reading this & derives some sort of satisfaction from it).
No, the thing that is most concerning is Kathy's inability to move her left foot. We need to ramp up her foot flexing excercises because her foot is trying to drop and tighten up. When Kathy tries to move her foot, all she gets is a vague elusiveness that enfuriates.
Like the foot of a rainbow, her foot always feels "somewhere else".
Wish I could describe how much it helps Kathy to have someone here. Little things like picking up a hand towel that is on the floor, making coffee, cleaning up a sick cat's mess next to the only toilet in the house that Kathy can use (that really happened this morning. good thing I didn't leave her alone. she would've had to push her foot in it!), putting that cat outside & locking the cat door, etc.
Good timing. Jerome just showed up. That means I get to go to work (oh Joy!).
Now the left leg is still in the spotlight, more for what it WON'T do than what it does. Don't get me wrong, it hasn't let up on being a comfort block, the leg still produces alot of that "P" word that I told myself not to write in this post (in case the left leg is reading this & derives some sort of satisfaction from it).
No, the thing that is most concerning is Kathy's inability to move her left foot. We need to ramp up her foot flexing excercises because her foot is trying to drop and tighten up. When Kathy tries to move her foot, all she gets is a vague elusiveness that enfuriates.
Like the foot of a rainbow, her foot always feels "somewhere else".
Wish I could describe how much it helps Kathy to have someone here. Little things like picking up a hand towel that is on the floor, making coffee, cleaning up a sick cat's mess next to the only toilet in the house that Kathy can use (that really happened this morning. good thing I didn't leave her alone. she would've had to push her foot in it!), putting that cat outside & locking the cat door, etc.
Good timing. Jerome just showed up. That means I get to go to work (oh Joy!).
Groundhog Day
You know what I'm talking about -
Like when you first wake up and you think you're normal, then quickly realize you're not. Every day you wake to the same thing. It gets so, if the leg hasn't started in yet, you don't move, so you can pretend, for a few minutes, there isn't a problem.
The frustration of being unable.
I feel for anyone who can't do what they have always done. It makes me less tolerant for people who can do, but don't.
Michelle from Mt. Shasta City stayed with Kathy today!
It's late now. I'm trying to keep a record in this blog to look back on, as well as letting you know of her progress. It's late though and I'm tired, so more tomorrow! Here's to All of us waking up tomorrow thinking we're normal (might be a first for some of us)!
Like when you first wake up and you think you're normal, then quickly realize you're not. Every day you wake to the same thing. It gets so, if the leg hasn't started in yet, you don't move, so you can pretend, for a few minutes, there isn't a problem.
The frustration of being unable.
I feel for anyone who can't do what they have always done. It makes me less tolerant for people who can do, but don't.
Michelle from Mt. Shasta City stayed with Kathy today!
It's late now. I'm trying to keep a record in this blog to look back on, as well as letting you know of her progress. It's late though and I'm tired, so more tomorrow! Here's to All of us waking up tomorrow thinking we're normal (might be a first for some of us)!
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Feast or Famine
Quick note from Ted (is there such a thing?)
So cool that so many came by to see Kathy yesterday!
I have to go to work, but kept delaying because this morning was rough. It started out when Kathy woke to her right foot killing her! After unwrapping it, we found the padding had shifted and allowed a bump in the cast to press into her foot all night! At the outside edge where your pinky toe joins your foot. It was a totally flat spot the size of a quarter and bright red OUCH! I took a Dremel to it so THAT won't happen again! (the cast, not her foot).
Right about the time I was going to start rescheduling jobs, Cindy showed up!
I'm way behind, but couldn't leave Kathy by herself. She has had a bit of time to let her situation sink in. Darkness creeps in when she starts to list the things she won't ever do again. It's the alone times that scare me most. How do you fight off depression by yourself?
Kathy had alot of visitors around the same time yesterday.
Cindy saved the day this morning (or I was staying home).
Please don't hesitate to call or stop by to visit.
Let's keep that dark dog at bay.
So cool that so many came by to see Kathy yesterday!
I have to go to work, but kept delaying because this morning was rough. It started out when Kathy woke to her right foot killing her! After unwrapping it, we found the padding had shifted and allowed a bump in the cast to press into her foot all night! At the outside edge where your pinky toe joins your foot. It was a totally flat spot the size of a quarter and bright red OUCH! I took a Dremel to it so THAT won't happen again! (the cast, not her foot).
Right about the time I was going to start rescheduling jobs, Cindy showed up!
I'm way behind, but couldn't leave Kathy by herself. She has had a bit of time to let her situation sink in. Darkness creeps in when she starts to list the things she won't ever do again. It's the alone times that scare me most. How do you fight off depression by yourself?
Kathy had alot of visitors around the same time yesterday.
Cindy saved the day this morning (or I was staying home).
Please don't hesitate to call or stop by to visit.
Let's keep that dark dog at bay.
Monday, November 14, 2011
Great day at the Love-Baumer house!!
I was waiting all day for time to set it's self aside so I could write an update..........but, funny how time waits for no man!
Good day tho! Kathy had a rough night with a lot of pain and today looked tired to me, but she was up and making calls and trying to get on top of things! She spends a decent amount of time being frustrated with her "temporary life"I so relate to how she feels...I honestly think it's a Capricorn thing! (Any Capricorn or anyone who's lived with a Capricorn will know what I mean:)!) Capricorns are strong, hard working goats who posses a certain know how and sureness of will. I'm grateful Kathy has this on her side and also completely aware(as a Capricorn myself) of what a struggle Kathy is going thru relinquishing control of her life!
Regardless of how scary I may find what she's insisting on doing, (getting out of her (very high)bed & transferring from her wheelchair to a toilet on her own) I try to encourage her independent streaks. This may be because I relate to the iron will and may be because I feel like...She's gonna have a heck of a hard road to hoe, why hold her back from the struggle when it will only make her stronger! And, I know it will!!!
Kathy spent most of the day on the phone; she transferred to her wheel chair and came out o join me as I made Shepard's pie and spaghetti sauce. We talked in the kitchen in between phone calls and if you blurred your vision you'd think it was "old times". Kathy had so much love today. In between medical, insurance and financial calls she talked to: Cindi, Michelle Lopez, Danielle, Mona, Michelle Tramblie, Kristi & Nicole...She had texts from various other friends and around 4:00 the visitors started flowing in!
Mona
Katie
Jerome
Tabitha
Brooke(Who brought INSANE amounts of casseroles to freeze and serve when needed...AMAZING!)
Parish
(a neighbor who's name starts with an A & brought enchiladas and other goodies...so sweet!)
Kristi
With dinner in the oven, I left about 5:30 knowing she was in fantastic company and hands! Kathy LOVES company!! Please do NOT hesitate to visit! She is a people person in the extreme and I think the visiting distracts her from the pain and helps fast forward time a little.
Kathy is such a sweet trooper!! I am in love with her as ever and am truly grateful for this time! I know it may sound strange, but how often really do we get to demonstrate just how far we would go for someone we love! Kathy went through SOOO much in her early life and I believe in life giving us balance! The lessons and strength she will gain from this "speed-bump" will push her to an un-human realm.............I will be here to absorb and transfer my own lessons! All things happen for a reason, right? I heard that once and time made it true!
Love, light and blessings,
Jess
Good day tho! Kathy had a rough night with a lot of pain and today looked tired to me, but she was up and making calls and trying to get on top of things! She spends a decent amount of time being frustrated with her "temporary life"I so relate to how she feels...I honestly think it's a Capricorn thing! (Any Capricorn or anyone who's lived with a Capricorn will know what I mean:)!) Capricorns are strong, hard working goats who posses a certain know how and sureness of will. I'm grateful Kathy has this on her side and also completely aware(as a Capricorn myself) of what a struggle Kathy is going thru relinquishing control of her life!
Regardless of how scary I may find what she's insisting on doing, (getting out of her (very high)bed & transferring from her wheelchair to a toilet on her own) I try to encourage her independent streaks. This may be because I relate to the iron will and may be because I feel like...She's gonna have a heck of a hard road to hoe, why hold her back from the struggle when it will only make her stronger! And, I know it will!!!
Kathy spent most of the day on the phone; she transferred to her wheel chair and came out o join me as I made Shepard's pie and spaghetti sauce. We talked in the kitchen in between phone calls and if you blurred your vision you'd think it was "old times". Kathy had so much love today. In between medical, insurance and financial calls she talked to: Cindi, Michelle Lopez, Danielle, Mona, Michelle Tramblie, Kristi & Nicole...She had texts from various other friends and around 4:00 the visitors started flowing in!
Mona
Katie
Jerome
Tabitha
Brooke(Who brought INSANE amounts of casseroles to freeze and serve when needed...AMAZING!)
Parish
(a neighbor who's name starts with an A & brought enchiladas and other goodies...so sweet!)
Kristi
With dinner in the oven, I left about 5:30 knowing she was in fantastic company and hands! Kathy LOVES company!! Please do NOT hesitate to visit! She is a people person in the extreme and I think the visiting distracts her from the pain and helps fast forward time a little.
Kathy is such a sweet trooper!! I am in love with her as ever and am truly grateful for this time! I know it may sound strange, but how often really do we get to demonstrate just how far we would go for someone we love! Kathy went through SOOO much in her early life and I believe in life giving us balance! The lessons and strength she will gain from this "speed-bump" will push her to an un-human realm.............I will be here to absorb and transfer my own lessons! All things happen for a reason, right? I heard that once and time made it true!
Love, light and blessings,
Jess
Calling ALL Kathy Love Benefit helpers!
The date of the fundraiser has been set!
December15th, 2011 7:00pm. at Roscoe's in Phoenix OR; This is going to be a concert event with The Rogue Suspects.
We will be meeting 7:00 pm, this Wen. the 16th at Roscoes. Please come join our small, but energetic benefit team to aid in the further planning of Kathys Benefit efforts!
Any questions, comments, ideas, money to donate(heehee) please come on down...if you're unable to attend, feel free to call or email me!
Love, light and blessings,
Jessica
541-941-2156
lilijade.creations@gmail.com
December15th, 2011 7:00pm. at Roscoe's in Phoenix OR; This is going to be a concert event with The Rogue Suspects.
We will be meeting 7:00 pm, this Wen. the 16th at Roscoes. Please come join our small, but energetic benefit team to aid in the further planning of Kathys Benefit efforts!
Any questions, comments, ideas, money to donate(heehee) please come on down...if you're unable to attend, feel free to call or email me!
Love, light and blessings,
Jessica
541-941-2156
lilijade.creations@gmail.com
Sunday, November 13, 2011
If it takes two hands
I like to say, "Don't carry a grudge. It's heavy and it doesn't have handles."
Carrying a grudge is different than just writing someone out of your life. Some people shouldn't be in your life and I've always thought that that's okay.
Some should be in your life, but aren't.
This whole thing with Kathy has me thinking about how cool people can be...
and on the opposite side, how petty.
Imagine if you and a friend had a falling out. Then add an accident. Would water under the bridge keep you from being friends again? Too deep to attempt? Dangerous undercurrents?
(I also like to say, "Not everyone waves their arms when they're drowning... There might not even be a drop of water in sight.")
I guess with all the people in the world, there isn't a strong argument for tolerating flaws. It's so easy to go from being willing to throw yourself in front of a train for your friend, to holding an eternal grudge.
If it slowed you down, if it gave you pause to think of those people, if you wondered what it would be like if they were still in your world... what would give then?
Friendships lost. Resentment. Would a good reason be stubbornness? Yours or theirs? Fear? Of what? Protecting someone? Who? Why? Would it be worth it?
Whoa! I'm off on a tangent. Let me regroup.
I think of the possible consequences if Kathy didn't have such great friends. It's the only way I let myself leave her when I go to work.
Right now she doesn't have time to curse the sky because she is never alone!
(I'm pretty sure if I had an accident, I would have time to rail in isolation).
I think I'm going to make a list of all my friends and make up to the ones I haven't been talking to...
Carrying a grudge is different than just writing someone out of your life. Some people shouldn't be in your life and I've always thought that that's okay.
Some should be in your life, but aren't.
This whole thing with Kathy has me thinking about how cool people can be...
and on the opposite side, how petty.
Imagine if you and a friend had a falling out. Then add an accident. Would water under the bridge keep you from being friends again? Too deep to attempt? Dangerous undercurrents?
(I also like to say, "Not everyone waves their arms when they're drowning... There might not even be a drop of water in sight.")
I guess with all the people in the world, there isn't a strong argument for tolerating flaws. It's so easy to go from being willing to throw yourself in front of a train for your friend, to holding an eternal grudge.
If it slowed you down, if it gave you pause to think of those people, if you wondered what it would be like if they were still in your world... what would give then?
Friendships lost. Resentment. Would a good reason be stubbornness? Yours or theirs? Fear? Of what? Protecting someone? Who? Why? Would it be worth it?
Whoa! I'm off on a tangent. Let me regroup.
I think of the possible consequences if Kathy didn't have such great friends. It's the only way I let myself leave her when I go to work.
Right now she doesn't have time to curse the sky because she is never alone!
(I'm pretty sure if I had an accident, I would have time to rail in isolation).
I think I'm going to make a list of all my friends and make up to the ones I haven't been talking to...
chemical cocktails & crisp
Three different meds to take at nine. Add two others to that mix at five. Pain meds every four hours. Three of one kind, one of another at bed timetime. Vitamins, Calcium, DHEA, fish oil, some of Jessica's pear crisp and, twice a day, another shot of Fragmin (this latest one in the hip area).
If you know Kathy, you know she is very headstrong, so it won't surprise you to hear that
as I write this on Kathy's laptop, she is taking some of her own stitches out! We wouldn't let her do it yesterday. With all the people she knows in the medical community, you would think Kathy would just have one of her friends do it for her, but nooOOOoo! She won't wait.
Patience is at the bottom of her strong traits.
Kathy's attitude is good. The house is quiet. Kathy's cats missed her. The boys are out. Visitors are coming by later. I have a job scheduled for this afternoon. This is our time! Right now! Stop the stitches removal! Stop blogging! Exit, stage left!
If you know Kathy, you know she is very headstrong, so it won't surprise you to hear that
as I write this on Kathy's laptop, she is taking some of her own stitches out! We wouldn't let her do it yesterday. With all the people she knows in the medical community, you would think Kathy would just have one of her friends do it for her, but nooOOOoo! She won't wait.
Patience is at the bottom of her strong traits.
Kathy's attitude is good. The house is quiet. Kathy's cats missed her. The boys are out. Visitors are coming by later. I have a job scheduled for this afternoon. This is our time! Right now! Stop the stitches removal! Stop blogging! Exit, stage left!
Saturday, November 12, 2011
the spice of life
Little variations can make all the difference in the world.
Kathy has to move her leg every few minutes or it starts to ache. It ALWAYS hurts, but when the bone pain that ice can't touch flares up, changing her leg position even a little bit can help.
I try to do what I can, and Kathy is gracious, but it is a better kind of different when one of her girls show up. I'm not offended by this, because it makes it easier on both of us.
Besides, just because I like peanut butter & banana sandwiches best, it doesn't necessarily mean Kathy does too! So when Michelle shows up and gives her peanut butter & honey sandwiches, it doesn't bother me if Kathy seems to enjoy them more than mine. Or really, when Jessica makes her PB & J's with strawberry jam, I don't mind that either. It's just a little bit different anyway. It all has peanut butter, right?
Julie stopped by today & brought drinks from my son Chris in Afghanistan. Michelle cooked the casserole that Jess made. Kathy has too much pain for me to to say she's spoiled, but I'M feeling pretty spoiled!
If this isn't making any sense to you, don't worry, I'm making it up as I write it.
I'm full of adrenaline.
I just gave Kathy her shot of Fragmin (a blood thinner she has to take until the Kumadin takes hold, so her vein repairs heal & her blood clots don't kill her). Belly shot or butt shot? Call me a weinie if you want to, it is NOT easy to give someone a shot!
Jess did it for me NO PROBLEM when she was here!
Michelle will sterilize the spot, but wants ME to do the dirty work!
(The differences between bananas, honey and strawberry jam).
Michelle watched "Horrible Bosses" with Kathy. I watched the Ducks beat Stanford!
See what I mean about little variations? Thought it might be getting to me deep down inside, didn't you?
Nope! It's nice!
Kathy is determined to figure out a system to be independent around the house.
The way I see it, she was independent BEFORE the accident, now it's time to try dependence for a little while. It's different!
Kinda like peanut butter & avocado sandwiches.
Kathy has to move her leg every few minutes or it starts to ache. It ALWAYS hurts, but when the bone pain that ice can't touch flares up, changing her leg position even a little bit can help.
I try to do what I can, and Kathy is gracious, but it is a better kind of different when one of her girls show up. I'm not offended by this, because it makes it easier on both of us.
Besides, just because I like peanut butter & banana sandwiches best, it doesn't necessarily mean Kathy does too! So when Michelle shows up and gives her peanut butter & honey sandwiches, it doesn't bother me if Kathy seems to enjoy them more than mine. Or really, when Jessica makes her PB & J's with strawberry jam, I don't mind that either. It's just a little bit different anyway. It all has peanut butter, right?
Julie stopped by today & brought drinks from my son Chris in Afghanistan. Michelle cooked the casserole that Jess made. Kathy has too much pain for me to to say she's spoiled, but I'M feeling pretty spoiled!
Michelle asked me to not mention the cornbread, so I won't
If this isn't making any sense to you, don't worry, I'm making it up as I write it.
I'm full of adrenaline.
I just gave Kathy her shot of Fragmin (a blood thinner she has to take until the Kumadin takes hold, so her vein repairs heal & her blood clots don't kill her). Belly shot or butt shot? Call me a weinie if you want to, it is NOT easy to give someone a shot!
Jess did it for me NO PROBLEM when she was here!
Michelle will sterilize the spot, but wants ME to do the dirty work!
(The differences between bananas, honey and strawberry jam).
Michelle watched "Horrible Bosses" with Kathy. I watched the Ducks beat Stanford!
See what I mean about little variations? Thought it might be getting to me deep down inside, didn't you?
Nope! It's nice!
Kathy is determined to figure out a system to be independent around the house.
The way I see it, she was independent BEFORE the accident, now it's time to try dependence for a little while. It's different!
Kinda like peanut butter & avocado sandwiches.
Friday, November 11, 2011
What do YOU think the odds are?
In times like this, people naturally look for the positive.
Nobody wants to be the Fuddy Duddy,
saying things to bring Kathy down, pointing out difficulties as impossible or spreading hopeless predictions to the people who love her.
Nobody wants to be the bearer of bad news.
With this in mind, It would be easy to be unrealistically optimistic.
Easy to make a big deal out of little things in an attempt to avoid being that person we don't want to be thought of as.
I have to tell you, there is no avoidance going on here.
Sure, there is the chance that Kathy may not walk right again, but I REALLY think she will!
I'm not saying that it will be easy for her to keep her spirits up, but from what I've seen of her friends so far, it will be alot harder to bring her spirits down!
From the cards and gifts and calls, to helping to take care of her, clean the house and making dinner (so I can get back to work), the positive energy from Kathy's friends is overwhelming!
I have thanked people in this blog who have stepped up for Kathy. I have neglected to thank so many who have sent cards, flowers and phone calls that have been a light in her world. A world that could've easily been dark without you.
So, I'm not exaggerating my appreciation.
I'm not faking my optimism.
I say life will be as great as it was. Greater even!
Kathy says I'm a Dreamer.
I say she's My Dream.
Odds are you will all get to share in this dream becoming a reality.
Nobody wants to be the Fuddy Duddy,
saying things to bring Kathy down, pointing out difficulties as impossible or spreading hopeless predictions to the people who love her.
Nobody wants to be the bearer of bad news.
With this in mind, It would be easy to be unrealistically optimistic.
Easy to make a big deal out of little things in an attempt to avoid being that person we don't want to be thought of as.
I have to tell you, there is no avoidance going on here.
Sure, there is the chance that Kathy may not walk right again, but I REALLY think she will!
I'm not saying that it will be easy for her to keep her spirits up, but from what I've seen of her friends so far, it will be alot harder to bring her spirits down!
From the cards and gifts and calls, to helping to take care of her, clean the house and making dinner (so I can get back to work), the positive energy from Kathy's friends is overwhelming!
I have thanked people in this blog who have stepped up for Kathy. I have neglected to thank so many who have sent cards, flowers and phone calls that have been a light in her world. A world that could've easily been dark without you.
So, I'm not exaggerating my appreciation.
I'm not faking my optimism.
I say life will be as great as it was. Greater even!
Kathy says I'm a Dreamer.
I say she's My Dream.
Odds are you will all get to share in this dream becoming a reality.
creepy visual
This is Ted.
So, Kathy said to me this morning that she is going to get callouses on her elbows and forearms from dragging herself around the house, legs trailing behind her.
My first thought was the boys...
Imagine getting a bowl of ice cream in the kitchen at night and without warning, Kathy comes crawling around the corner! Freak out!!!
What if she gets really fast at it?!? What if she thinks it's funny to chase us all over the house?!?
After telling my buddy Eric about my concerns, he gifted Kathy some knee pads & elbow pads (along with flowers). He's looking out for me. Callouses make scritchy scratchy sounds on sheets that would keep me from sleeping. Nice guy that Eric.
The other option is for Kathy to just use her wheel chair. I hope she chooses that one.
It is strange to think about doing the OPPOSITE of child-proofing the lower shelves. I'll have to put things down low so Kathy CAN reach them!
It is so great to have her home!..even if she freaks the boys out!
So, Kathy said to me this morning that she is going to get callouses on her elbows and forearms from dragging herself around the house, legs trailing behind her.
My first thought was the boys...
Imagine getting a bowl of ice cream in the kitchen at night and without warning, Kathy comes crawling around the corner! Freak out!!!
What if she gets really fast at it?!? What if she thinks it's funny to chase us all over the house?!?
After telling my buddy Eric about my concerns, he gifted Kathy some knee pads & elbow pads (along with flowers). He's looking out for me. Callouses make scritchy scratchy sounds on sheets that would keep me from sleeping. Nice guy that Eric.
The other option is for Kathy to just use her wheel chair. I hope she chooses that one.
It is strange to think about doing the OPPOSITE of child-proofing the lower shelves. I'll have to put things down low so Kathy CAN reach them!
It is so great to have her home!..even if she freaks the boys out!
Home Sweet Home!!
What a great trip, really! With my van transformed into some sort of princess & the pea love wagon, we transported the Love bird home safe and sound.
We were much later leaving than we has wished and, oh boy, was Kathy ever raring to go!! There were phone calls at Grants Pass, Sutherlin and nearing Beaverton. When we arrived she was all but waiting at the curb! :) Room packed, meds taken,wheelchair ready, cart ready...LET'S BLOW THIS POPCICLE STAND!! Everyone was seriously sad to see her leave. Kathy, even amid the worst days, was a delight and because of her strong, cheerful spirit; she gained a solid Emanuel Legacy fan base. I'm sure she will stay in touch!
Kathy slept part of the way and Ted and I talked for 8 of the 10 hours...For how much time we've spent together, it's amazing how little we know about the other.(Nothing builds a bond quite like a 10 hour road trip...He shared with me his angst for Big Brother and radical politics and I spoke about the natural birthing process, breaking the cycle of passing on learned behaviors and the difference between working to live and living to work! lol)
Kathy and I talked the last hour as Ted slept and it was reminiscent of the multitudes of car rides we've shared(Minus the princess& the pea love wagon...which I feel should stay! ) It's always a great feeling driving back into our beautiful Rogue Valley & this trip was frosted in butter cream. How blessed we are that Kathy is coming home; so soon and, at all.
Leaving the Hospital and thinking back to those scary touch and go days...Ted & Kathys home in Eagle Point may as well be the Emerald City. It is beautiful!! Ted lifted Kathy into her wheelchair and after a wheelie or two, she rested in the entry and was greeted by the Boys handmade "Welcome Home" signs. Surrounded by familiar sights, sounds, smells, and the love of her three cats; Kathy took a tour of her own home and was happy it was still clean. ;)
Kathy wasted no time putting her things in order; wheeling herself to and fro(difficult on carpet) making sure her hospital items found an adequate home! She is resting now and I'm expecting a full nights sleep out of her...we are all pretty beat!
Kathy has a Dr. appt on Mon and a trip back to Portland on the 23rd...will be filling in tomorrow and putting together that promised calendar for future visitors, helpers and nurses.
Hip, Hip, HOORAY!! Three cheers for Kathy and a big fat, "welcome home Sister"!!!
Love, light and blessings!
Jes
We were much later leaving than we has wished and, oh boy, was Kathy ever raring to go!! There were phone calls at Grants Pass, Sutherlin and nearing Beaverton. When we arrived she was all but waiting at the curb! :) Room packed, meds taken,wheelchair ready, cart ready...LET'S BLOW THIS POPCICLE STAND!! Everyone was seriously sad to see her leave. Kathy, even amid the worst days, was a delight and because of her strong, cheerful spirit; she gained a solid Emanuel Legacy fan base. I'm sure she will stay in touch!
Kathy slept part of the way and Ted and I talked for 8 of the 10 hours...For how much time we've spent together, it's amazing how little we know about the other.(Nothing builds a bond quite like a 10 hour road trip...He shared with me his angst for Big Brother and radical politics and I spoke about the natural birthing process, breaking the cycle of passing on learned behaviors and the difference between working to live and living to work! lol)
Kathy and I talked the last hour as Ted slept and it was reminiscent of the multitudes of car rides we've shared(Minus the princess& the pea love wagon...which I feel should stay! ) It's always a great feeling driving back into our beautiful Rogue Valley & this trip was frosted in butter cream. How blessed we are that Kathy is coming home; so soon and, at all.
Leaving the Hospital and thinking back to those scary touch and go days...Ted & Kathys home in Eagle Point may as well be the Emerald City. It is beautiful!! Ted lifted Kathy into her wheelchair and after a wheelie or two, she rested in the entry and was greeted by the Boys handmade "Welcome Home" signs. Surrounded by familiar sights, sounds, smells, and the love of her three cats; Kathy took a tour of her own home and was happy it was still clean. ;)
Kathy wasted no time putting her things in order; wheeling herself to and fro(difficult on carpet) making sure her hospital items found an adequate home! She is resting now and I'm expecting a full nights sleep out of her...we are all pretty beat!
Kathy has a Dr. appt on Mon and a trip back to Portland on the 23rd...will be filling in tomorrow and putting together that promised calendar for future visitors, helpers and nurses.
Hip, Hip, HOORAY!! Three cheers for Kathy and a big fat, "welcome home Sister"!!!
Love, light and blessings!
Jes
Thursday, November 10, 2011
one day soon
Ted here.
Here, not there with Kathy, yet.
Thought I would pop in before we leave & let everyone know that this blog will continue after Kathy is home. There is still so much to do. So far to go to get where she is going to be.
I can't wait to report Kathy's progress. Hopefully one day in the not so distant future I will be able to write that My Girl walks again! Not yet, but one day...
We're bringing her home!!! Time to go!!!
Here, not there with Kathy, yet.
Thought I would pop in before we leave & let everyone know that this blog will continue after Kathy is home. There is still so much to do. So far to go to get where she is going to be.
I can't wait to report Kathy's progress. Hopefully one day in the not so distant future I will be able to write that My Girl walks again! Not yet, but one day...
We're bringing her home!!! Time to go!!!
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Wait till you hear this!!
Hello all! Suzanne Here.
First of all I must say that Kathy & myself slept really good last night. I was so happy to see Kathys beautiful PAINLESS face. What a difference a day makes, for sure. I felt comfortable enough to leave her for a few ours, to partake in a lunch date with my daughter, Sharon. BIG MISTAKE! Upon my return, I heard the funniest story. The staff asked Kathy if she felt well enough, to take an independent spin in the wheelchair. She was sooooo excited, and responded with a "HELL YES"! She was having a grand old time, enjoying her freedom, having a nice little chat on her phone. Well....she leaned over to fix her sock, and tipped over in her wheel chair!! She didn't hurt herself physically, but was so freaking humiliated. You see, for convenience of going pee, she has been going comando downstairs, if you know what I mean. As she tipped her blanket came off, and HELLO KITTY!! The first thing I thought is, CRAP! I wasn't there to protect my girl. The next thing I thought was, CRAP, Ted is going to be so mad and disappointed in me. Thank goodness for the nice gentlemen that hoisted her butt back to her wheelchair. I'm so greatfull for she didn't injure herself, however, I laughed my ass off, when she filled me in on her little spill.
Any way, Kathy has all her IV's out, and preparing for her exit, from Legacy Emanuel Medical Center. What an amazing Hospital, and staff. As you can imagine, she will be soarly missed by all the Tracu team.
Keep your fingers crossed, that she has a painfree night, for her last time.
As this time draws near, I will be saying good-bye for now, to my beautiful friend. I hope that my stay was helpfull, in some way. I know it was for me! I love you my friend, and know that NO ONE CAN CLIP YOUR WINGS.
I love you............Suzanne
First of all I must say that Kathy & myself slept really good last night. I was so happy to see Kathys beautiful PAINLESS face. What a difference a day makes, for sure. I felt comfortable enough to leave her for a few ours, to partake in a lunch date with my daughter, Sharon. BIG MISTAKE! Upon my return, I heard the funniest story. The staff asked Kathy if she felt well enough, to take an independent spin in the wheelchair. She was sooooo excited, and responded with a "HELL YES"! She was having a grand old time, enjoying her freedom, having a nice little chat on her phone. Well....she leaned over to fix her sock, and tipped over in her wheel chair!! She didn't hurt herself physically, but was so freaking humiliated. You see, for convenience of going pee, she has been going comando downstairs, if you know what I mean. As she tipped her blanket came off, and HELLO KITTY!! The first thing I thought is, CRAP! I wasn't there to protect my girl. The next thing I thought was, CRAP, Ted is going to be so mad and disappointed in me. Thank goodness for the nice gentlemen that hoisted her butt back to her wheelchair. I'm so greatfull for she didn't injure herself, however, I laughed my ass off, when she filled me in on her little spill.
Any way, Kathy has all her IV's out, and preparing for her exit, from Legacy Emanuel Medical Center. What an amazing Hospital, and staff. As you can imagine, she will be soarly missed by all the Tracu team.
Keep your fingers crossed, that she has a painfree night, for her last time.
As this time draws near, I will be saying good-bye for now, to my beautiful friend. I hope that my stay was helpfull, in some way. I know it was for me! I love you my friend, and know that NO ONE CAN CLIP YOUR WINGS.
I love you............Suzanne
Kathy coming home??? (Jess updating from Medford)
Yes! They are releasing the love-bird and returning her to her natural habitat! They were shooting for tomorrow, but it's looking like it will most likely be Friday. I was in utter dis-belief of this news and chalked it up to "drowsy-drug talk":) I am still uneasy & don't understand HOW they are going to send her home in two days when she is still on IV meds and pain-killers..........?? It is VERY difficult for me to not be there to see what's going on for myself!
Regardless of the questions and concerns about her release; I do believe home is where she will heal best...surrounded with her things, her germs, her cats, her family and her FRIENDS!! We will need to be putting together a "Care-Calendar" for her. Ted needs to be working as much of these future days as possible and Kathy will need help on a daily basis! I will buy a special calendar for the house and as we get nurse volunteers, we will fill in the slots! Please be thinking about your future visits and casseroles!:)
Ted and I will be carpooling up on Thursday in my van; It's no life-flight, but decked out with an air mattress and all the pillows and lavender oil we can get our hands on, it will bring her safely and hopefully, comfortably, home!
I am still recovering from dropping my life for that first week and am struggling to get my end of Kathys fundraiser off the ground(My home computer crash was NOT helpful). Naobi has made a facebook page for her benefit and we will be getting the word out there VERY soon!! I've had multiple offers from volunteers and I promise you, I will be finding jobs for ALL of you!:)
I've not talked to Kathy yet today...yesterday was no ray of sunshine; I pray this new day graces her with a positive, joyful and grateful spirit!
Love, light and blessings for us ALL!!
Jessica
Regardless of the questions and concerns about her release; I do believe home is where she will heal best...surrounded with her things, her germs, her cats, her family and her FRIENDS!! We will need to be putting together a "Care-Calendar" for her. Ted needs to be working as much of these future days as possible and Kathy will need help on a daily basis! I will buy a special calendar for the house and as we get nurse volunteers, we will fill in the slots! Please be thinking about your future visits and casseroles!:)
Ted and I will be carpooling up on Thursday in my van; It's no life-flight, but decked out with an air mattress and all the pillows and lavender oil we can get our hands on, it will bring her safely and hopefully, comfortably, home!
I am still recovering from dropping my life for that first week and am struggling to get my end of Kathys fundraiser off the ground(My home computer crash was NOT helpful). Naobi has made a facebook page for her benefit and we will be getting the word out there VERY soon!! I've had multiple offers from volunteers and I promise you, I will be finding jobs for ALL of you!:)
I've not talked to Kathy yet today...yesterday was no ray of sunshine; I pray this new day graces her with a positive, joyful and grateful spirit!
Love, light and blessings for us ALL!!
Jessica
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Having a tough day
Hi all! Suzanne here. Sure was tough seeing Danielle & Janelle off at the airport. We have really enjoyed helping our Kathy! I can't take too much credit for the comedy act, as Danielle & Janelle are really quite the crack up. It was great to see Kathy smile and laugh.
As Danielle said, we have been really having fun being together as friends. Hope it took Kathy's mind off her pain. We also enjoyed spending time with Ted. I hope having us here has taken a little bit of . strain off of him. His phone was ringing off the hook yesterday, with all kinds of work to be had!
Any way, I will be here till Sunday. We are hoping that our gal can come home on Thursday (fingers crossed)!
What an amazing friend we all have in Kathy, and I for one, will thank the good lord above, for keeping her with us. I look forward to the day that her & Ted can have the "Happily ever after", that they deserve.
I will say that Kathy is in an amazing amount of pain today, so if she doesn't respond to phone calls or texts, she is trying to get some much needed rest.
Till tomorrow all....
Suzanne
As Danielle said, we have been really having fun being together as friends. Hope it took Kathy's mind off her pain. We also enjoyed spending time with Ted. I hope having us here has taken a little bit of . strain off of him. His phone was ringing off the hook yesterday, with all kinds of work to be had!
Any way, I will be here till Sunday. We are hoping that our gal can come home on Thursday (fingers crossed)!
What an amazing friend we all have in Kathy, and I for one, will thank the good lord above, for keeping her with us. I look forward to the day that her & Ted can have the "Happily ever after", that they deserve.
I will say that Kathy is in an amazing amount of pain today, so if she doesn't respond to phone calls or texts, she is trying to get some much needed rest.
Till tomorrow all....
Suzanne
Monday, November 7, 2011
Plan B
Kathy just said, "It could have been far worse." A great realization for her to have. Hard to believe after everything she has been through. Ted gave us the photo tour last night starting with the scene of the accident...amazing, and YES, it could have been far worse. She is lucky to be alive! We are lucky she is alive. I cannot stop seeing her strength in every move she makes and every conversation she has with the nurses, OT's, Dr.'s and so on.
Her pain level is still getting up there. They tried to give her a block to make her comfortable for 24 hours but it really didn't work completely.
She just got back from x-rays and is feeling tired. I tried to put her down for a nap but she needs to update Jessica first. So sweet. Then hopefully she will sleep for awhile. Deep down I know she won't because she has been acting like a child that fights sleep in fear of missing something. Her thirst for life? Maybe it's the hostess in her wanting to entertain her "out-of-town" friends.
This is my last blog as it has been a quick weekend and time to go back to Colorado early in the morning. I don't feel comfotable leaving her right now. I wish I had the flexibility and means to stay for 6 months to get her on her feet again. I know she is in great hands with Ted and all of her girlfriends but still so sad to leave her.
I have never had so much fun in a hospital before. I feel so much better knowing we helped her in some small way or anyway at all. The shower was most gratifying. I have never seen anyone enjoy running water in their hair so much.
I hope she has an easy transition at home. First obsticle will be the toilets. A wheelchair won't fit as they are enclosed. They need to find a wheelchair, shower chair, toilet chair, etc. Oh the things we take for granted. There will be more obsticles, however, nothing Ted and Kathy can't face together. Their love is beautiful, undying and productive. It is truely inspiring.
Jeanelle found the perfect plaque for Kathy "Life is all about how you handle Plan B." I know she will make the best of Plan B.
We love you Kathy, more today than ever before. You are an inspiration to all of us. Your Colorado girls "Team Pain Relief" is always here for you so call on us anytime!
Till we dance again,
Danielle, Jeanelle and Suzanne
Her pain level is still getting up there. They tried to give her a block to make her comfortable for 24 hours but it really didn't work completely.
She just got back from x-rays and is feeling tired. I tried to put her down for a nap but she needs to update Jessica first. So sweet. Then hopefully she will sleep for awhile. Deep down I know she won't because she has been acting like a child that fights sleep in fear of missing something. Her thirst for life? Maybe it's the hostess in her wanting to entertain her "out-of-town" friends.
This is my last blog as it has been a quick weekend and time to go back to Colorado early in the morning. I don't feel comfotable leaving her right now. I wish I had the flexibility and means to stay for 6 months to get her on her feet again. I know she is in great hands with Ted and all of her girlfriends but still so sad to leave her.
I have never had so much fun in a hospital before. I feel so much better knowing we helped her in some small way or anyway at all. The shower was most gratifying. I have never seen anyone enjoy running water in their hair so much.
I hope she has an easy transition at home. First obsticle will be the toilets. A wheelchair won't fit as they are enclosed. They need to find a wheelchair, shower chair, toilet chair, etc. Oh the things we take for granted. There will be more obsticles, however, nothing Ted and Kathy can't face together. Their love is beautiful, undying and productive. It is truely inspiring.
Jeanelle found the perfect plaque for Kathy "Life is all about how you handle Plan B." I know she will make the best of Plan B.
We love you Kathy, more today than ever before. You are an inspiration to all of us. Your Colorado girls "Team Pain Relief" is always here for you so call on us anytime!
Till we dance again,
Danielle, Jeanelle and Suzanne
We have alot of preparation to do
Danielle, Suzanne & Jeanelle are doing their best to keep Kathy laughing.
That's not easy to do when that old familiar foe "PAIN" won't get the hint and give us all a break! Sheesh! Enough with the bully boy tactics already!
The nerve block in her right leg is supposed to be keeping her ankle pain tolerable until tomorrow, but doesn't meet expectations.
Right ankle update; grafted tendons on the inside of the ankle. Slight infection prevented the outside tendon work at this time. This means a follow up surgery will be necessary down the road.
The surgeon explained that it means Kathy will have a weakness to rolling her ankle to the inside.
Then he added something none of us knew - Her left ankle also has damage to the outside ligaments!?!
Now she can't roll either ankle without serious damage potential!! How hard will it be to learn how to walk again, with unstable tendons in both feet, a bum left knee and a left foot you can barely move or feel except for the tingling burning acid sensation?!?
It's a bigger chore to maneuver Kathy into position for stuff (wheelchair, potty...), now that she can't put weight/stress on her right ankle or left knee to help shift her body around.
We looked through the pictures taken step by step through this ordeal. It felt wrong to take the first few at the scene after the EMT's arrived, but I'm glad we did. Kathy didn't remember all of it, so it is interesting to see her reaction at some of the pics. I hope to download a chronology of "accident to recovery" so all her friends can see how far she has come!
Well, it's been fun. I would rather be here on Kathy's worst day than anywhere else without her. It's getting late though. I'm heading back. Falling behind too much on work. I can't wait to bring her home. Hopefully this week! Better get the house ready. Brought new shirts and shorts. Kathy says, "At least we don't have to worry about shoes!"
It would be alot harder to leave tonight if Kathy didn't have such a great bunch of friends here with her.
That's not easy to do when that old familiar foe "PAIN" won't get the hint and give us all a break! Sheesh! Enough with the bully boy tactics already!
The nerve block in her right leg is supposed to be keeping her ankle pain tolerable until tomorrow, but doesn't meet expectations.
Right ankle update; grafted tendons on the inside of the ankle. Slight infection prevented the outside tendon work at this time. This means a follow up surgery will be necessary down the road.
The surgeon explained that it means Kathy will have a weakness to rolling her ankle to the inside.
Then he added something none of us knew - Her left ankle also has damage to the outside ligaments!?!
Now she can't roll either ankle without serious damage potential!! How hard will it be to learn how to walk again, with unstable tendons in both feet, a bum left knee and a left foot you can barely move or feel except for the tingling burning acid sensation?!?
It's a bigger chore to maneuver Kathy into position for stuff (wheelchair, potty...), now that she can't put weight/stress on her right ankle or left knee to help shift her body around.
We looked through the pictures taken step by step through this ordeal. It felt wrong to take the first few at the scene after the EMT's arrived, but I'm glad we did. Kathy didn't remember all of it, so it is interesting to see her reaction at some of the pics. I hope to download a chronology of "accident to recovery" so all her friends can see how far she has come!
Well, it's been fun. I would rather be here on Kathy's worst day than anywhere else without her. It's getting late though. I'm heading back. Falling behind too much on work. I can't wait to bring her home. Hopefully this week! Better get the house ready. Brought new shirts and shorts. Kathy says, "At least we don't have to worry about shoes!"
It would be alot harder to leave tonight if Kathy didn't have such a great bunch of friends here with her.
optimistic pessimism
Still in surgery.
Kathy is most afraid of CRPS (I think it means Chronic Regional Pain Syndrome).
It's where your body has inappropriate response to stimuli
(Like the burning acid feeling Kathy gets when someone lightly touches her foot).
Her surgeon said it's too soon to make that diagnosis.
She had a traumatic injury to her leg that included her nerves and he has seen in other patients the same pain reaction she is getting.
We are also concerned with the ligaments in Kathy's left knee.
Same surgeon said her knee will be very stiff for a long time as the cartilage was damaged, the knee repair and muscle injury will require extensive therapy to regain enough mobility to walk, but her knee should be stable and he is not overly concerned about her ligaments.
I'm still a bit worried though.
It seems like he's saying, "Since we've stopped the headwound from bleeding, I'm not concerned about whether she can hear on that side.".
Boy I probably really confused people with that one! Kathy does NOT have a head injury.
I was just making an example.
The surgeon probably isn't overly concerned about her smile either, but I'm concerned about it ALL!
Cadaver ligaments. That's so cool! Proud to say I'm an organ doner. It will be great to let someone else use my parts when I'm done with them!
Kathy is most afraid of CRPS (I think it means Chronic Regional Pain Syndrome).
It's where your body has inappropriate response to stimuli
(Like the burning acid feeling Kathy gets when someone lightly touches her foot).
Her surgeon said it's too soon to make that diagnosis.
She had a traumatic injury to her leg that included her nerves and he has seen in other patients the same pain reaction she is getting.
We are also concerned with the ligaments in Kathy's left knee.
Same surgeon said her knee will be very stiff for a long time as the cartilage was damaged, the knee repair and muscle injury will require extensive therapy to regain enough mobility to walk, but her knee should be stable and he is not overly concerned about her ligaments.
I'm still a bit worried though.
It seems like he's saying, "Since we've stopped the headwound from bleeding, I'm not concerned about whether she can hear on that side.".
Boy I probably really confused people with that one! Kathy does NOT have a head injury.
I was just making an example.
The surgeon probably isn't overly concerned about her smile either, but I'm concerned about it ALL!
Cadaver ligaments. That's so cool! Proud to say I'm an organ doner. It will be great to let someone else use my parts when I'm done with them!
Do you have time for another one? Surgery that is.
The return. No, Kathy's not returning home yet - Ted's back.
Today is a super exciting day because Kathy's left leg will be closed up completely!
Almost time for her surgery at 10:45.
The same surgery is also going to finally address her right ankle! The plan is to graft cadaver tendons/ligaments (what's the difference between a tendon & a ligament?) to help support the ankle bones.
Right now Kathy has a machine on her left leg that flex's the knee about 20 degrees (think raising your knee enough to place a softball under it).
Every surgery she wears a "bear paw", which is a gown that circulates hot air through it to regulate her body temperature.
Kathy is getting some feeling in her left foot, which would be brilliant except, she says it feels like burning acid!! All the time tingling pain like when your foot falls asleep unless you touch it and WOW THAT HURTS!! Still it's a good thing. Better than no feeling at all. It's just hard to convince Kathy that it's a good thing.
Gotta go! It's time for surgery again!
Today is a super exciting day because Kathy's left leg will be closed up completely!
Almost time for her surgery at 10:45.
The same surgery is also going to finally address her right ankle! The plan is to graft cadaver tendons/ligaments (what's the difference between a tendon & a ligament?) to help support the ankle bones.
Right now Kathy has a machine on her left leg that flex's the knee about 20 degrees (think raising your knee enough to place a softball under it).
Every surgery she wears a "bear paw", which is a gown that circulates hot air through it to regulate her body temperature.
Kathy is getting some feeling in her left foot, which would be brilliant except, she says it feels like burning acid!! All the time tingling pain like when your foot falls asleep unless you touch it and WOW THAT HURTS!! Still it's a good thing. Better than no feeling at all. It's just hard to convince Kathy that it's a good thing.
Gotta go! It's time for surgery again!
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Therapy this, therapy that!
Physical therapy is here attaching a CPM (continuous passive motion) on her left leg. It automatically bends the knee for range of motion. Sheepskin and straps. Jeanelle is taking alot of pictures. She should do 2 degrees twice a day for 1 hour each time. Now IV therapy has arrived but very anticlimatic. She only need to change caps on Kath's IV in her shoulder.
We kept Kathy up all day yesterday. She went on a wheel chair ride to have lunch with us, so cool. This was the first day she has not taken a nap. We were so busy doing nothing. And it was great, just like old times.
Suzanne took the night shift and slept in Kathy's room. She is on babysitting duty at her daughter's house for the day so Kathy is stuck with The Jeanelle and Danielle show. Hopefully we won't do any damage as our beautiful Kathy is so fragile but seemingly stronger everyday.
Kathy is missing the "H" key on her computer keyboard which really makes it ard to type er name and gender so frequently so I am going to get back to er now and start te sow.
The things we do for LOVE!
Danielle
We kept Kathy up all day yesterday. She went on a wheel chair ride to have lunch with us, so cool. This was the first day she has not taken a nap. We were so busy doing nothing. And it was great, just like old times.
Suzanne took the night shift and slept in Kathy's room. She is on babysitting duty at her daughter's house for the day so Kathy is stuck with The Jeanelle and Danielle show. Hopefully we won't do any damage as our beautiful Kathy is so fragile but seemingly stronger everyday.
Kathy is missing the "H" key on her computer keyboard which really makes it ard to type er name and gender so frequently so I am going to get back to er now and start te sow.
The things we do for LOVE!
Danielle
Saturday, November 5, 2011
At last!
Howdy Y'All! Danielle from Colorado here.
I sit here with Kath sipping tea like nothing has ever happened and it feels sooooooooooooooo good! Oh but something HAS happened...alot has happened. Thanks to her amazing husband, fantastic girlfriends and YOUR overwhelming support she is almost like herself again in spirit! What at truely amazing person she is. Don't get me wrong, she has huge challenges everyday. Sitting on her butt all day everyday is one of them. She has a trapeze hanging above her so she can change positions...bed sore management...she told Ted she was going to talk me into giving her a butt massage later...uuuummmmmm....mmmmmmmhhhhhhhh...I'm still thinking about it...haha. I am definately going to do it and you can see video on u-tube but you will have to pay to see it or maybe we will auction it off in a fundraising effort to help Kath out. Yes! The things we do for LOVE! Kathy LOVE that is.
Very nice Dr.'s and Nurses coming thru now so I will keep you all posted or one of us Crested Butties will.
Kathy loves you all and can't stop thanking you for all of your support. She said she could never make it through this without you.
TX Update: Surgery on Monday and a minimum of 8 weeks off of the right leg and off of the left leg for much longer due to all of the damage. Good news...could be going home next week....lets pray for that!
Visitor Update: Suzanne Bouchard and I showed up last night. I am with Kath till Tuesday along with Jeanelle Walters who comes in this morning. Thankfully Suzanne will be here all week.
Be good to eachother!-Danielle
I sit here with Kath sipping tea like nothing has ever happened and it feels sooooooooooooooo good! Oh but something HAS happened...alot has happened. Thanks to her amazing husband, fantastic girlfriends and YOUR overwhelming support she is almost like herself again in spirit! What at truely amazing person she is. Don't get me wrong, she has huge challenges everyday. Sitting on her butt all day everyday is one of them. She has a trapeze hanging above her so she can change positions...bed sore management...she told Ted she was going to talk me into giving her a butt massage later...uuuummmmmm....mmmmmmmhhhhhhhh...I'm still thinking about it...haha. I am definately going to do it and you can see video on u-tube but you will have to pay to see it or maybe we will auction it off in a fundraising effort to help Kath out. Yes! The things we do for LOVE! Kathy LOVE that is.
Very nice Dr.'s and Nurses coming thru now so I will keep you all posted or one of us Crested Butties will.
Kathy loves you all and can't stop thanking you for all of your support. She said she could never make it through this without you.
TX Update: Surgery on Monday and a minimum of 8 weeks off of the right leg and off of the left leg for much longer due to all of the damage. Good news...could be going home next week....lets pray for that!
Visitor Update: Suzanne Bouchard and I showed up last night. I am with Kath till Tuesday along with Jeanelle Walters who comes in this morning. Thankfully Suzanne will be here all week.
Be good to eachother!-Danielle
Thursday, November 3, 2011
Day of Transfers
Ronda here again.
Kathy looks very pretty today with her hair freshly shampooed and braided, makes me smile to see little pieces of Kathy Love come back everyday. She is now off with Occupational Therapy to learn how to transfer into the bathtub when she gets home. She will be non weight bearing on the right leg for another 8 weeks minimum after her surgery on Monday. She will be off the left leg for much longer. The upside is her arms will be very buffed!!
The really good news is that she may be back in Medford as early as 3 weeks from now, of course depending on how the next few surgeries go. She really needs her peeps around her......
She is in better spirits today. She is always happy to get out of this room.
Love and hugs to all who read this blog :):)
Kathy looks very pretty today with her hair freshly shampooed and braided, makes me smile to see little pieces of Kathy Love come back everyday. She is now off with Occupational Therapy to learn how to transfer into the bathtub when she gets home. She will be non weight bearing on the right leg for another 8 weeks minimum after her surgery on Monday. She will be off the left leg for much longer. The upside is her arms will be very buffed!!
The really good news is that she may be back in Medford as early as 3 weeks from now, of course depending on how the next few surgeries go. She really needs her peeps around her......
She is in better spirits today. She is always happy to get out of this room.
Love and hugs to all who read this blog :):)
Hands up! You are being highjacked!
Okay. Ted here.
This sight was intended to be a place where people could go to find out how Kathy is doing.
I am not in Portland with Kathy right now. I wish I was.
I can't stop thinking about how she is doing. I like to think she needs me there.
If that is true, it makes me crazy wondering how she is doing without me.
I have discovered a need to escape into the therapy of unloading on this blogsight.
Knowing that Kathy hasn't read any of these posts yet, I write things that I want her to see when she does.
Some of it may seem off the wall to you. Some of it is pretty sappy.
All of it is how I feel.
Kathy is used to this from me in our normal lives.
I'm always telling her how Beautiful she is, telling her stupid little stories (where she inevitably winds up in my arms) and expressing my opinion (much to her exasperation).
The force that drives these posts has morphed from providing information to Kathy's friends, to wanting Kathy to see how much she is loved.
It's a version of standing in the town square and yelling at the top of my lungs that I love this girl!
You're probably thinking, "DUH! Ted, you're married to her!".
Please excuse me if you logged on to get first hand news on how Kathy is doing today.
I don't know.
Other than what she tells me on the phone, and knowing Kathy, she will say she is fine so I don't worry.
I hope that, if you talk to Kathy, you tell her her I'm crazy about her!
It's alright if you don't.
She'll see it when she reads this blog.
This sight was intended to be a place where people could go to find out how Kathy is doing.
I am not in Portland with Kathy right now. I wish I was.
I can't stop thinking about how she is doing. I like to think she needs me there.
If that is true, it makes me crazy wondering how she is doing without me.
I have discovered a need to escape into the therapy of unloading on this blogsight.
Knowing that Kathy hasn't read any of these posts yet, I write things that I want her to see when she does.
Some of it may seem off the wall to you. Some of it is pretty sappy.
All of it is how I feel.
Kathy is used to this from me in our normal lives.
I'm always telling her how Beautiful she is, telling her stupid little stories (where she inevitably winds up in my arms) and expressing my opinion (much to her exasperation).
The force that drives these posts has morphed from providing information to Kathy's friends, to wanting Kathy to see how much she is loved.
It's a version of standing in the town square and yelling at the top of my lungs that I love this girl!
You're probably thinking, "DUH! Ted, you're married to her!".
Please excuse me if you logged on to get first hand news on how Kathy is doing today.
I don't know.
Other than what she tells me on the phone, and knowing Kathy, she will say she is fine so I don't worry.
I hope that, if you talk to Kathy, you tell her her I'm crazy about her!
It's alright if you don't.
She'll see it when she reads this blog.
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
I would slay dragons for you
Seriously, don't you hate when you are watching a movie and so much bad stuff happens that you can't take much more? Instead of going straight to "Happily Ever After" there is the filler of wrapping up loose ends. So much time left - there is bound to be more bad stuff! Like when the monster is dead, but the camera keeps panning back to it, so you KNOW it isn't over! This is the part of the story where you want the happy ending to hurry up and get here before something else bad happens!...
Setting the scene;
The Hero commoner is gone (I get to be the Hero commoner, because I'm writing this).
The Princess is recovering from her ordeal (still Beautiful, as always).
In some ways the rescue didn't go as planned, but the dragon is dead and the Princess is still adored by all (no surprise here).
The Princess will forever be indebted to the Hero commoner (which is kind of cool, because they were already secretly in Love).
The Hero commoner rests uneasy, for he can not stop thinking, "Was the dragon really dead?".
(You see, he knew he had run it through, but neglected to cut off it's head!)
...and just like in the movies that would come long after his time, his attention keeps going back to the monster.
In his minds eye he's looking for a twitch of an eyelid, a shallow breath ...not trusting this apparent victory.
So now the Hero commoner is gone. He can not stay with his Princess if the dragon still lives.
He can not take a chance of any more harm coming to her...
This is the part of the movie where everyone wishes the dragon dead, but you just don't know for sure.
This is the part of the story where you go, "I KNEW IT! I knew there was more! NO WAY it would be THAT easy!", (Forgetting how hard it really was).
This is where I slay dragons for Kathy while she recovers... FOR REAL.
I might need help.
Setting the scene;
The Hero commoner is gone (I get to be the Hero commoner, because I'm writing this).
The Princess is recovering from her ordeal (still Beautiful, as always).
In some ways the rescue didn't go as planned, but the dragon is dead and the Princess is still adored by all (no surprise here).
The Princess will forever be indebted to the Hero commoner (which is kind of cool, because they were already secretly in Love).
The Hero commoner rests uneasy, for he can not stop thinking, "Was the dragon really dead?".
(You see, he knew he had run it through, but neglected to cut off it's head!)
...and just like in the movies that would come long after his time, his attention keeps going back to the monster.
In his minds eye he's looking for a twitch of an eyelid, a shallow breath ...not trusting this apparent victory.
So now the Hero commoner is gone. He can not stay with his Princess if the dragon still lives.
He can not take a chance of any more harm coming to her...
This is the part of the movie where everyone wishes the dragon dead, but you just don't know for sure.
This is the part of the story where you go, "I KNEW IT! I knew there was more! NO WAY it would be THAT easy!", (Forgetting how hard it really was).
This is where I slay dragons for Kathy while she recovers... FOR REAL.
I might need help.
Better Days.....
This is Ronda, I got here this morning to see Kathy's lovely spirit and positive attitude. Amber and Michelle just showed up, she absolutely loves it when people show up for a visit. Oh ya, Mark was here too...
Jess called and wants to remind everyone that the benefit meeting for Kathy is at 7pm tonight at the Havana Club , across the street from Four Daughters.....
Kathy's swelling has gone down significantly, it's amazing to watch her progress, even in a day!!
On Friday, Danielle, Janelle and Suzanne, will be here,. I think it will be a mad house. Kathy cant wait. Sorry I missed you last weekend Kristi, but happy you were here for K.
Well, I never really did too well in "creative writing" so time for me to sign off before we lose readers :)
TTYL.....
Here's an update from today:
Hope you don't mind Ronda - I checked on the blog, hoping you wrote, and when Kathy told me you thought you accidentally deleted the message you wrote, I figured it probably saved to Drafts, so I published it!
Jess called and wants to remind everyone that the benefit meeting for Kathy is at 7pm tonight at the Havana Club , across the street from Four Daughters.....
Kathy's swelling has gone down significantly, it's amazing to watch her progress, even in a day!!
On Friday, Danielle, Janelle and Suzanne, will be here,. I think it will be a mad house. Kathy cant wait. Sorry I missed you last weekend Kristi, but happy you were here for K.
Well, I never really did too well in "creative writing" so time for me to sign off before we lose readers :)
TTYL.....
Here's an update from today:
Hope you don't mind Ronda - I checked on the blog, hoping you wrote, and when Kathy told me you thought you accidentally deleted the message you wrote, I figured it probably saved to Drafts, so I published it!
Update from Medford
Hi Friends, Jessica here.
Ronda was able to be with Kathy today, but had some trouble with the blog...She will be sending a Kathy update this evening:)
I talked to Kathy for a short time this morning and was so happy to hear the spit-fire returning to her voice! Her stubborn determination is one of my favorite of her qualities...haha!!
One of the things I shared with her today was this observation: Kathy's accident has affected and re-arranged the priorities of SO MANY people...It's truly amazing to hear about and to watch; It's like we've all gotten a second chance too! A second chance to take advantage of what a gift and a blessing our lives are...It has reminded us how lucky we are to have amazing humans like Kathy in our day to day and how easily we tend to take our friends and family for granted! This priceless lesson is coming at quite a cost to her...
I invite ALL who are available to come to our fundraiser brainstorming session tonight(7:00pm @Havana Republic: 123 W. Main St. Medford) I know that Kathy has an abundance of friends, all talented in different ways. Looking forward to meeting and getting to know you ALL!
Love, light and blessings!!
Ronda was able to be with Kathy today, but had some trouble with the blog...She will be sending a Kathy update this evening:)
I talked to Kathy for a short time this morning and was so happy to hear the spit-fire returning to her voice! Her stubborn determination is one of my favorite of her qualities...haha!!
One of the things I shared with her today was this observation: Kathy's accident has affected and re-arranged the priorities of SO MANY people...It's truly amazing to hear about and to watch; It's like we've all gotten a second chance too! A second chance to take advantage of what a gift and a blessing our lives are...It has reminded us how lucky we are to have amazing humans like Kathy in our day to day and how easily we tend to take our friends and family for granted! This priceless lesson is coming at quite a cost to her...
I invite ALL who are available to come to our fundraiser brainstorming session tonight(7:00pm @Havana Republic: 123 W. Main St. Medford) I know that Kathy has an abundance of friends, all talented in different ways. Looking forward to meeting and getting to know you ALL!
Love, light and blessings!!
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
carry on without me
Out of surgery. In good spirits. Still has wound vacs on both sides of her left calf. Thought one side would be closed up after this surgery. Staples removed from right thigh (where the veins were harvested for left knee). Steri-strips in place instead. Serious stretching of calf muscles while Kathy was out. I have to leave. Did not go outside today. Waited for surgery. Starving. Hasn't eaten for 24 hours. Nurses love her. I have to leave. She can maneuver herself over the edge to the potty. How will she get the potty next to the bed? Sometimes the nurses take so long to answer. Ordered food. The next two days will be lonely for Kathy. Put a layer of pillows under her sheet. I have to leave. Hasn't read these blog posts yet. Said she can't post on drugs. May not be updates until someone visits. Sad. Because... I have to leave.
I am reminded of bumblebees
Watching the people in Kathy's life go into crises mode to help, is remarkable!
Practically mixing a gumbo with all the planned activity!
Literally bumping into each other organizing different ideas!
Inspiring in their enthusiasm!
...and a little a little embarrassing.
As I write this it seems we have so much.
Sure, Kathy gives of herself and this is really all about her, but the part of this that is embarrassing, that I'm kicking myself for, is not having health insurance on her.
It adds a stupid aspect to this whole thing that is inexcusable. I'm fighting Geico Insurance right now, because Full Coverage Motorcycle Insurance apparantly covers everything EXCEPT MEDICAL FOR THE ONE PAYING THE POLICY!?! If you aren't sure you better check your policies.
I don't know where this is going to end up, but it's the last thing I want Kathy to worry about. If I have to work the rest of my life paying medical bills (kicking the bucket at 95 while on the job). To have Kathy here, it will be worth it!
She's in surgery again.
I'm glad Kathy has friends who are helping. Honey Makers!
Busy friends, excited to be the kind of friend Kathy is to them.
Lotsa sweetness flowin 'round heah!
Kathy won't forget what you are doing for her... I know I sure won't ever forget it either!
Practically mixing a gumbo with all the planned activity!
Literally bumping into each other organizing different ideas!
Inspiring in their enthusiasm!
...and a little a little embarrassing.
As I write this it seems we have so much.
Sure, Kathy gives of herself and this is really all about her, but the part of this that is embarrassing, that I'm kicking myself for, is not having health insurance on her.
It adds a stupid aspect to this whole thing that is inexcusable. I'm fighting Geico Insurance right now, because Full Coverage Motorcycle Insurance apparantly covers everything EXCEPT MEDICAL FOR THE ONE PAYING THE POLICY!?! If you aren't sure you better check your policies.
I don't know where this is going to end up, but it's the last thing I want Kathy to worry about. If I have to work the rest of my life paying medical bills (kicking the bucket at 95 while on the job). To have Kathy here, it will be worth it!
She's in surgery again.
I'm glad Kathy has friends who are helping. Honey Makers!
Busy friends, excited to be the kind of friend Kathy is to them.
Lotsa sweetness flowin 'round heah!
Kathy won't forget what you are doing for her... I know I sure won't ever forget it either!
what if it was you?
Is it better to have a life left unlived, when something bad happens, or to have lived life fully?
Kathy always says, "There is a million ways to live your life!"
I'm pretty sure waiting for ANOTHER surgery wasn't one of the ways she considered.
A big part of why she is so cool is that Kathy loves new experiences and doesn't judge people.
The adventurous side of her has taken her all over the world.
Even so, the things that she really loves aren't the big spectacle attractions, but getting off the beaten path, living like the locals.
I tell her she is too trusting. She has more faith in humanity than I do.
It doesn't hurt that she is so cute.
She talks to everybody the same, with a respect unearned, given freely.
Not pretentious, she finds the good in everyone she meets.
As a result, she has people who love her from all over!
More than most of the people I know, Kathy lives life fully!
When you climb higher you have a farther distance to fall.
If she lived life for just herself the loss of ability is hers alone,
but she lives it in a way that adds to the lives of those around her.
It will be a loss to us all if we let her lose her great spirit for life.
There may be a million ways to live your life, but Kathy chose to live a life with all of us in hers.
Isn't your life better for it?
Kathy always says, "There is a million ways to live your life!"
I'm pretty sure waiting for ANOTHER surgery wasn't one of the ways she considered.
A big part of why she is so cool is that Kathy loves new experiences and doesn't judge people.
The adventurous side of her has taken her all over the world.
Even so, the things that she really loves aren't the big spectacle attractions, but getting off the beaten path, living like the locals.
I tell her she is too trusting. She has more faith in humanity than I do.
It doesn't hurt that she is so cute.
She talks to everybody the same, with a respect unearned, given freely.
Not pretentious, she finds the good in everyone she meets.
As a result, she has people who love her from all over!
More than most of the people I know, Kathy lives life fully!
When you climb higher you have a farther distance to fall.
If she lived life for just herself the loss of ability is hers alone,
but she lives it in a way that adds to the lives of those around her.
It will be a loss to us all if we let her lose her great spirit for life.
There may be a million ways to live your life, but Kathy chose to live a life with all of us in hers.
Isn't your life better for it?
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