When things are bad.
When she doesn't want to be cheered up...
I don't just give in to Kathy's mood.
Instead I try to say or do something that tickles her, slightly, unexpectedly.
The corners of her mouth turn up and she raises her eyes to mine.
It's a little victory.
That is, until Kathy notices me noticing, then the mood that doesn't want to go away comes back,
and still I smile inside.
If this was an attitude without cause, an ignorant anger,
I would be less tolerant.
If I didn't care to make things better.
If this was another case of someone being wrong in their behavior.
At my best I can regard the shortcomings of others with polite incredulity.
This thing with Kathy is different.
Any doubts that you may have, would be erased if you saw the fact finding mission she undertook to see where her pain level is at without the pain meds masking it.
I'll tell you what, this is one tough girl.
To endure this, to know it is not over, the uncertainty of what the future will bring...
I saw this thing happen to the girl of my dreams.
I am seeing the ripples, from the boulder that splashed our lives, continue to disturb our tranquility.
Big enough to prevent a smooth finish,
but not big enough to surf on.
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